Ask A Ravenclaw

Soprano1 sits in a squashy armchair by the fire in Ravenclaw Tower, arduously knitting in ends on some stranded-colorwork baby booties.  A large bag full of lace and beads occasionally whacks her on the head, a bit of Traveling Scarf nips at her ankles, a single child's striped sock dances on the table nearby, chanting what sounds like "Where's my mate? Where's my mate?" in a tiny high-pitched voice.  Most eerily, the head of a lavender-colored elephant floats in midair in front of her, looking dolefully at her as if to say, "Are you ever going to finish me?"  And a long bit of 2-stitch i-cord is winding its way slowly up her right leg.


"Nothing is finished, not one project," she mutters.  "It's already halfway through March and I'm never going to get anything done."  She takes a sip of butterbeer and goes back to weaving in ends, and barely glances up when Peck flutters down to rest on her shoulder.


::Person?::
::Soprano1?::


Soprano1 looks up, finally, at her tiny owl companion, and seems slightly dazed as she asks, "What is it, Peck?"


::Person, Peck sorry but...::
::is Tuesday::


"Oh!" Suddenly Soprano1 is looking alert.  She puts down the tapestry needle and pushes the big lace shawl out of her way.


::Rock and Stick Person say Peck better bring Person letter::
::Is here::


Peck holds out a claw, clasping a tiny envelope.


Soprano1 takes out her wand, whispers Engorgio! and the letter pops up to normal size.


Dear Soprano1,


I keep hearing about the Warpy Weaving Snarfalump, but I don't know what it is, or where I can find one. Do I need one?  Are they Very Scary? Please help!


Love,
Weavemenot.


Dear Weave,


As it happens, I know the answer to this, having recently had first-hand experience of the Warpy Weaving Snarfalump.


This very past weekend, I and a group of other Hogwarts students encountered a Warpy Weaving Snarfalump on a field trip to the mysterious land of Northampton, Massachusetts.  We gathered together in a magical place called WEBS, full of yarn and fiber and fabulous yummies!  But even here, as demonstrated by Fantasyflyte, there were early concerns about the possibility of meeting a Snarfalump.

The trail into the Moste Magickal Chamber of Yarn is a beautiful one, and those who enter for the first time are often overwrought, as was ACWmaiden:

At first, we thought the most frightening creature we would meet was Mardi Gras Barf Yarn.  Poor Vertigo1414 looks quite shocked, does she not?

Here we are playing "Guess which one is the Deputy Headmistress?"  Don't let the matching sweaters fool you!

Next up, we uncovered several strange creatures:

A Rare Shelf Moose

A Felty Penguin

Is that an octopus?  I need to teach my kid to use the zoom lens.

And of course, the Wild Buttoned Hedgehogs!

But no Snarfalump!  We were relieved!  Baskets were filled!  Headmistress NeedlesnSwiffers relaxed and began working on her OWL. 

But then BrittneyK spotted it.  How pleased she looked:

Sparksearcher heard her call and looked up in alarm:

Or is she just terribly pleased about that shinyshiny yarn she's squishing?

Hale and TrustCrazyIdeas may have thought this was it, but it wasn't.

And... no, that's not it either.  That's D1 wearing my sweater.

At last, the Deputy Headmistress and the Headmistress spotted it.  Leading the way, they discovered it lurking in the Weaving Department:

Fortunately, it was easily subdued and we all returned to relaxing in the conveniently placed armchairs.

The V was particularly tired, and thought that Vertigo1414 made an excellent pillow.

It was quite an ordeal, Weavemenot!  The Snarfalump is truly a terrifying creature!  But we got to eat at a Muggle restaurant and buy tons of yarn, so it was all worth it.

Hope you get to come with us next time we hunt the Warpy Weaving Snarfalump!  Hogwarts field trips are the best!

Excuse me, now, I must get back to my OWL before this silly bag hits me in the head again.

Love,

Soprano1

Ask A Ravenclaw

Peck flies in, with Foxy ::wagwagwagging:: at his heels.

::Person! We gots letter!::

::Foxy help answer!::

Soprano1 takes the letter and strokes Foxy's soft white fur as she reads:

Dear Soprano1,

How do you train an Arctic Fox?

Love,

Curiosity killed the fox

Dear Curiosity,

I found the answer in the Tower chat room.  What a funny place to find it, right? 

It involved a pair of beautiful foxes named Nanuk and Delilah.  Here they are:

PorcupineSnuggles of Ravenclaw actually helped train these beauties, as she shared in the chat room the other night:

soprano1

February 18, 2011 8:33 PM

This week’s Ask A Ravenclaw… “How do you train an arctic fox? Love, Curiosity Killed the Fox.”

Fortunately, we had Foxy right there to answer:

GazeboGal

February 18, 2011 8:33 PM

::’Splain what you would like. Give treats::

But even more amazingly, we had Ravenclaw PorcupineSnuggles, who has actually trained arctic foxes... and little red foxes too!

PorcupineSnuggles

February 18, 2011 8:34 PM

Good job, Foxy! That’s exactly what I did! The tricky part was keeping the treats until after fox did what he was supposed to

SadieLou

February 18, 2011 8:34 PM

Do you know, the Foxy School of Obedience is how I trained my dogs. Funny how it only works half the time… and only ever with treats!

GazeboGal

February 18, 2011 8:35 PM

::Dogs is happy. Is the plan.::

soprano1

February 18, 2011 8:36 PM

Dog Motto: Will Work for Food.

(That bit of wisdom brought to you by my experience training Ian EagerBeagle).

PorcupineSnuggles

February 18, 2011 8:36 PM

Fox Motto: Will work for food. If stealing food is not an option.

Ask A Ravenclaw

::Person! Person! Quick answer question!::
::Maybe get Monkey off our backs?::

Peck flies in and drops a banana-peel-smudged note in Soprano1's lap.


Dear Soprano1,


Why is it that not one Head of House at Hogwarts has a prehensile tail?  Does no one appreciate the importance of being able to swing from the rafters to oversee student activity?  Should not the next Ravenclaw Head of House have a tail?  Wouldn't that be much better for everybody?  Isn't it completely obvious?  Or perhaps your feeble brains simply can't appreciate the beauty and perfection inherent in this statement.


Sincerely,
Banana Breath


Soprano1 sighs and looks around.  She spots TriGirlJ in the corner handing out badges with bananas on them and calls her over. 


Whatcha got there, TriGirlJ?


This?  Oh, this is Toppington von Monacle's campaign button.

Wait... let me get this straight.  The monkey we, er, found on the Mutation Table in the Spring of 2010 is campaigning for Head of House?

Oh, come on, Soprano1, it's not like he didn't earburn you in his Open Letter to the Headmistress.

Soprano1 clears her throat and looks down at her shoes.

You may have a point, there, TriGirlJ.  You've decided to support Toppington's candidacy then, eh?  What convinced you?

Well, he's for... tails! and math!  and he's against fondoo and marshmallows... I don't exactly support him in those stances but...

He gave me a button.  I like it.  It has a banana.

Quite.  Er... does anyone know... can a monkey campaign for Head of House?  Can anyone campaign for Head of House?  I was only a First Year when CMelvin retired; I barely knew where the Common Room was.  I don't remember there being a campaign, though.

Well, I don't have all the answers, but I must say, it's been a lively week in The Tower.  Fortunately we had Hogsmeade Weekend to distract us from politics!  And perhaps when we meet again we'll know whether the next Ravenclaw Head of House can--or should--be a simian.

Ask A Ravenclaw

Soprano1 looks up from her OWL knitting , on which she has been concentrating all evening, to see Peck flying around her head in frantic circles.


::Person! Person! Peck have Big Idea for ee Good Question::
::Looklooklook::

Peck drops a tightly rolled piece of parchment in Soprano1's lap.


Dear Soprano1,


When is a Raven like a Writing Desk?


Sincerely,
Alice in Wonderland


Well, first off, of course, it's "Why is a raven like a writing desk?" unless you've been watching a Muggle film adaptation of Alice. :)  If you really must know, there's an acceptable answer here... but when we turned to Ravenclaw Gingerlucy for an answer, we found out the depth to which the answer truly outclasses the question.


Gingerlucy told us that, indeed, a Raven is not at all like a writing desk.  A baby owl, on the other hand, is very much like a writing desk if you hold it like this, though I'm not sure I'd want to try to write on it:

A golden eagle could carry a writing desk, I think.  Here is one about to fly away with Gingerlucy:

And... well... these aren't at all like a writing desk.  But then, they're kestrels, so why would they be?

They are awfully cute, aren't they?  Gingerlucy's pretty adorable too, IMHO.


So there you have it, one more fact-filled answer from Ravenclaw Tower! Peck wants to play with those baby kestrels, Gingerlucy... do you think they'd eat him for breakfast?


Love,
Soprano1

Ask A Ravenclaw

An exhausted Peck enters the Ravenclaw Common Room through the little Owl-Shaped window way up at the tippy-top.  He shakes heavy snow and ice off his feathers and flies down to Soprano1's lap.


::I brought ee letter::
::Has good question::
::Tired. Sleep now::

Peck snuggles down into the hair on Soprano1's right shoulder as she takes out the parchment and reads:


Dear Soprano1,


I have heard that an infestation of Gernumbli Gardensi (also known as the common British Garden Gnome) can lead to health, happiness, and great joy.  Can you explain this?


Love and hugs,
Gnomeless


Dear Gnomeless,


For the answer to your wonderful question, I turn to the lovely and talented KnitWit685, who has graced Ravenclaw Tower with an entire Gnome colony.  Here is her answer:


I would love to answer your gnome questions. When I joined Ravelry I was amazed to find that there is a group for every possible interest a person might have. So one day I decided to show my DH how amazing Ravelry is. My conversation with him went something like this:

me: Say you like gnomes - I bet there is a group for that.
dh: Really? Show me. 
me: Sure! looks for gnome group and finds one … joins gnomemakers group

From there I participated in a few gnome swaps and fell in love with the little guys. I tried out several gnome patterns but I always come back to my all time favorite which is the Alan Dart yuletide gnome pattern.

Gnomes have brought a lot of joy into my life! While I was in a gnome swap I met my best friend on Ravelry aerieiris - aerieiris is the person who told me about the HPKCHC - so that is my story of gnomes and how it brought me to all of you ♥

So there you have it, Gnomeless!  Gnomes bring love and light to all...  check out Sgnome White and the Seven Gnomes!

Hugs!

Soprano1

Ask A Ravenclaw

Peck the Wee Tiny Owl flies in from the Owlery with a note for Soprano1


::Peck find note!::
::Note have Good Question!::
::Bring to SopranoPerson for Good Answer!::

Soprano1 spreads out the bit of parchment and reads:


Dear Soprano1,


How many singing cupcakes does it take to blow up the lab?


Sincerely,
Hiding Under the Mutation Table


Dear Hiding,


First of all, please, please get out from under the Mutation Table.  No place in Ravenclaw Tower's Lab is entirely safe, but the Mutation Table is definitely the last place anyone should hide.  Also, I hope you have your safety goggles on; the Sentient Goop is very sensitive about Lab Safety.


To answer your question, I turn to Deputy Headmistress GazeboGal.  GazeboGal looks at me and replies, "Singing cupcakes?  Oh, you mean last Monday's breakfast? You don't really want to hear about that, do you?  Of course not.  Singing... singing... I was wondering about lace singing.  Oh, that's right!  The other day I was hoping that lace would speak to me the way cables do... Ravenclaws came to the Common Room and shared their poetic answers.


Oh, I remember that, GG! The answers were lovely and interesting!


Drake told us that to her, 

lace speaks less definitively than cables. Lace whispers riddles, and speaks around the subject. (‘Mars is bright, tonight.’)

It murmurs around the subject, and the story shapes in the spaces between the stitches, the curve along a line of decreases. A conversation in the selection of a boutonniere, the flick of a fan, the flutter of eyelashes.

Cables tell you what they are doing, how they act. Lace hints about what it feels, what it thinks, about the hidden depths of its character. It does talk, but you have to listen differently.

Andryl, a self-declared "Math person," said,

The lace does not whisper to me of its feelings, its hopes and its dreams.

The lace boasts of its slowly and consistently increasing number of stitches, of the mathematical regularity of its repeated patterns. It shows me how cleverly it can produce different groups of stitches that all add to the same number. 

First Year Kere, apparently unharmed in the Unfortunate Singing Cupcake Event, chimed in too:

Lacey bits are kind of like the the characters in Jane Austen or Diana Gabaldon. They’re exceedingly mannerly and polite, and sometime you have to put everything down and read carefully to suss out what they’re trying to say. They can’t just say “what a lovely bit of lace!”. They have to get all flowery about it. “The elevation and drape of the line through the feathery section lends a bit lightness of being one usually finds in the blossoms of the dogwood in the spring which inspire a consequential lightness in the heart of the bearer…”

And SFCorgi shared the thing that hurts her most:

You know what hurts me?

When someone makes a lace shawl, and they’re like, “Oh, I made a little mistake, but I couldn’t find it and I figured no one will notice so I kept going.” Yeah, but they kept going in a way that meant that none of their subsequent stitches lined up properly with the pattern. Then the lace screams to me, “No, I’ve been mangled beyond repair!” I can’t believe sometimes that people can’t notice a mistake like that.

I fudge errors in garter stitch (I’m looking at you, Damson) but in a complex pattern, I always, always keep looking until I find that missing yarn over or botched decrease, and drop down and fix it, or at the very least, do my fudging in the correct location so that the pattern isn’t jarringly interrupted. 

Eightlegeddj and I (Soprano1) may or may not have compared our colorwork to rebellious teenagers, but Shawl Master OneNeedleKnitting reminded us:

What I keep forgetting when I do colorwork, coming from a lace background, is that you can block things besides lace. I do 8 rounds of stranded colorwork and get all frustrated because it’s so wonky, and then I wiggle it and stretch it all different ways on the needles, and suddenly it looks just fine. I just forget that I need to do that, oh, say, everytime I start a new colorwork project.

I assume you are way beyond me and block all your colorwork, in which case I can’t help you, but I had to share my perspective nonetheless. 

I leave you with this beautiful shawl by the Shawl Master herself:

Much love,

Soprano1

Ask A Ravenclaw

Soprano1, accompanied by her wee tiny owl, Peck, drags a heavy trunk into the Ravenclaw Common Room on her way to the dormitory.  She drops the trunk halfway to the dormitory stairs and spends some time hugging all her friends and welcoming the new First Years.

Ravenclaw Prefect Silverwing26 comes by, pompoms tucked under her arm.  "Oh, wait," she says, dropping the pompoms on the floor.  "I have a note for you."  She rummages in the pockets of her super-stylish skirt and draws out a piece of parchment.  "Here you go."  She starts to walk away, but Soprano1 calls her back.

"You can help me with this one," Soprano1 says.  "Here, have a look."  Silverwing26 takes the parchment and reads aloud:

Dear Soprano1,


What did you do during your Holidays?  Do you have any New Year's Resolutions?  Whatever am I to do about those extra pounds on my hips from all the Treacle Tart I ate at Christmas?


Happy New Term!
Tummy Troubles

"Oh, you're right! I can help!" says Silverwing26, and together they sit down to write:

Dear Troubles,


We had a lovely Holiday.  We spent a good deal of it together eating Treacle Tart and knitting on the couch, so we completely feel your pain.


When we weren't eating, Soprano1 was busy mustering a Penguin Army.  Here they all are, with Peck as their Unit Leader.  EvilMichelle of Slytherin joined in as the Air Force division: she is the only person we know clever enough to install a jet pack on a penguin.  

But eventually the Penguin Army went off to do its bit in the Cuteness Crusade, and then we were back to boredom and eating.  Fortunately Silverwing26 came up with the answer in the last days of the hols: she went to SparkPeople (a free site that helps you track your nutrition and/or fitness) and reinstated the Harry Potter Knit/Crochet House Cup SparkTeam, and we're off to a great start with a challenge and lots of friends. Anyone who would like to join us, please come on over!  


Love and hugs,
Soprano1 and Silverwing26

Ask A Ravenclaw

Peck settles down on Soprano1's shoulder with a new note clutched in his claw.


Dear Soprano1,


I have ripped every single part of this lace pattern back and re-knit it.  If I can't get it right, I am going to frog the whole thing and give the yarn to the Merry Beasts for nest making, confetti, and stringing marshymallows on.


HELP, please!!!  Thank you!


--Coming Unlaced.


Dear Unlaced,


For this week's answer we turn to the fabulous SFCorgi, owner of Tryst and Radar the Agility Doggies and soon-to-be Mama of Baby Corgi.  Her ability to commune with lace is renowned throughout Ravenclaw Tower.


In this post, SF Corgi gave advice to KnitWit685, a fellow 'Claw, who was having lace issues.

• First of all, make friends with that chart. Try not to translate it into words in your head. Be the chart. Look at the nice diagonal lines made by the yarn overs. See the yarn overs in your work and how they line up? Look at any nice lines that are made by decreases, too. And you know what notion is your best friend? Highlighter tape.
• As you are knitting, pay attention to how your work lines up with the previous rows. If anything is out of alignment, try to catch it immediately.
• Uh-oh, you found a mistake! The #1 most common mistake in lace knitting is a forgotten yarn over. You’ll probably catch this on the following right side row. Do you need to rip back? Nope! Grab a crochet hook.
• Let’s say you forgot a yarn over on row 4, which was a right side row, and now you are working on row 6. Stick your crochet hook under the running thread between two stitches of row 4, where the yarn over was supposed to be, from front to back. Use the hook to grab the running thread from row 5. Pull that thread through, forming a new knit stitch, and slip it onto your left needle. Bingo, a shiny new yarn over without ripping back!
• Sometimes I notice I really screwed something up. But I still hate tinking, so I engage in Advanced Error Correction Techniques. To do this, I determine what section needs to be repaired - maybe one stitch pattern repeat, or even just part of it. I slip the stitches for that section off the needles and scoot the rest of my stitches away from the needle tips so no extra ones fall off.
• Then I grab dpns in the same size (or sometimes a size smaller). I unravel the selected stitches to wherever the mistake started and leave a ladder. Then I carefully knit them back up, one row at a time, using my dpns. Lace Kninja!

I have used this advice myself, dear friends, and it is some of the most helpful advice I've ever read.  SFCorgi has proven her Lace Kninja status multiple times with beauties like this:

So, off with you, make friends with your charts and Knit Some Lace!!!

Hugs,

Soprano1

Ask A Ravenclaw

Soprano1's little owl Peck flaps into the Great Hall, bearing the following missive.  Soprano1 reads it and grins.


Dear Soprano1,


I'm hungry.  What's for dinner?


Sincerely,
Hungry


Dear Hungry,


Usually when faced with hunger pangs, we call upon eightlegeddj, our resident culinary arts student, to help us.  Meg is currently taking a Term Away with Hufflepuff, but she still comes back whenever we call with Culinary Questions.   However, last week, GazeboGal had a new and unusual answer to this timeless question in Ravenclaw Tower.  In a post, she wrote, "A Grouse has died by flinging itself against my window. Window = cracked, and we’ve gotten out the How to dress wild game book."


Of course, because the Tower is full of Ravenclaws, we didn't just pull up chairs to the dinner table, we had a discussion about it!  MightyGoodYarn told us that she wished her dinner would fling itself against her window--except for the mess the jar of marinara sauce would make.  Andryl shared a story about how an attempt to Avoid Bears led to a Grouse Horror Story, and confirmed for us all that the plural of grouse is, indeed, 'greese.'  SFCorgi chimed in with a tale of a mad sparrow (but not Sparrow) that tried to eat her through a glass window (unsuccessfully, thank Bob), and eightlegeddj came by with a suggestion for preparing the departed grouse (parsnips, potatoes, and rosemary.  Sounds yummy!  Now I'm waiting for a grouse to fling itself at my window!).  


Then Yakira started the best part of the discussion: the part about The Joy of Cooking.  I grew up worshiping Grandma's copy (published in 1936 according to theJoykitchen.com, the online home of The Joy of Cooking) and Mom's, the 1975 version.  Truly, these books provided recipes for preparing just about anything you might shoot (or that might fling itself at your window).  The newer versions lack the all-around knowledge about how to prepare venison and elk, sadly, but the recipes are mighty tasty, and although we established that Julia Child did not write The Joy of Cooking, she certainly used it.  Here, thanks to Wikipedia, is a lovely picture of Julia's well-worn copies of Joy. 

At the end of the day, GazeboGal reported:

She has been dubbed Alice the Grouse, thanked for the gift of her life, and her tail feather added to my kitchen altar.

She dressed out to 312 grams without skin, and is being roasted even now on a bed of onions with a chicken broth sauce and bacon wrappings. (Alice, being a Wild Bird, had no fat of her own to speak of)

Fannie Farmer to the rescue for temperature and roasting time.

She will be served with bread-cube dressing and green salad and more prayers of thanks. And possible a sip of October beer.

We name them so that we will always remember that they are part of us.

Thank you, GG, for that wisdom, and for bringing Alice the Grouse to our hearts if not to our tables.  

Love,

Soprano1

Ask A Ravenclaw

Hello, folks, I am Soprano1, your friendly Ravenclaw Reporter, here to bring you a brand new feature: Ask a Ravenclaw.  There is simply no better way to get an answer to a troubling question than by asking a Ravenclaw, and I have access to Ravenclaws with answers!  You may PM me your questions to future questions, but for this week's column, I bring you this anonymous inquiry.

Dear Soprano1,

Now that it is fall, my bus stop is terribly cold in the mornings!  How do I keep it warm?

Shivering in Chicago

***

Dear Shivering,

To answer your question, I turned to Jayannell, a Wisconsin Ravenclaw whose friends faced just this problem.  Jayannell told me about a group of witches and wizards (calling themselves 'knitters' to mislead the Muggles) in Madison whose bus stop was chilly.

The answer, simply: Knit a Bus Stop Cozy.

Jayannell says, "One of my knitting friends, Ann, works as a manager at Madison Metro (the bus company) and got to be the person to give the go-ahead for the bus shelter project. That just delighted her, and then she got a bunch of people to knit at work for the shelter. She works with some guys she described as 'old-time Teamsters' who thought the concept was completely kooky. But when Ann took one of them to see the installation, he was so excited that he called his wife to come downtown to see it right then.

"I hear that the bus drivers have been driving really slowly past this shelter because people want to take pictures."

The AV Club website wrote this lovely article to explain the phenomenon.

So, there you have it, Shivering.  If your bus stop is cold, knit a cozy!

Much love,

Soprano1