Friday, May 4, 2012

Going Away for the First Time

Dear Auntie Muriel,

I'm so worried about my precious daughter. She will be going to Hogwarts this next term. This will be the first time she's been away from home, her father and I, as well as her many brothers. I would like to talk with her about what my mother lovingly referred to as the swallowtails and honeybees. I just have no idea where to start. Her brothers were easier as their father handled the discussion and I just provided a woman's perspective. But with my dear Guenevol, where do I start?

Most sincerely,
 A concerned mother

Dear Auntie Muriel,
My mom adores your column, so I just know she'll be writing to you before I start my new term at Hogwarts. I know she'll be worried about me and boys and being on my own. But, I won't really be on my own. I have four older brothers who are upper class men this next term. Yes, it will be my first long term stay away from home. That's actually, what I'm more worried about. I won't know where the lights are when I'm hungry before popping in to bed. I'll have to learn to set my own timer for studies and having fun and doing the things that need doing daily and weekly. How do I handle it all? And, how do I let my mom know I'm going to be okay?

Today's letters came in this week. The new term has just begun this week at Hogwarts. We love having the witches and wizards learn magic in a controlled environment. But, that can bring predicaments for both the parents and children. I selected the letter from the mother as it represents how many moms of daughters feel, and with the Yankee holiday Mother's Day just around the corner, I felt it important to share a mother's concerns as she lets go of her daughter a little. On the other end of the spectrum, is a young lady more concerned with the practicalities of life than with holding off the strange eleven year old boys.

My advice for both ladies is the same. Talk with each other. Share your fears. Know that the other really does love you, no matter how it seems at times. By sharing what you need from the other to feel safe and sharing what you will do if not feeling safe, you create a space for both sets of fears and hopes to be heard and understood.

Dear Readers, do you have any words of wisdom for our two ladies? What would you do in their situations? Who do you identify with more, and why?

For future columns, who would you like highlighted? What issue would be fun to read about? Canon characters or House Cuppers that you'd love to see highlighted? Let me know what you are interested in.

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