Saturday, May 19, 2012

What to do if your significant other is in a different house?

Last time, dear readers, we enjoyed looking at the fears of mother and child on their ways to separating for a term at Hogwarts. This time our letter comes from a younger Hufflepuff, whom has strong feelings for an upper class man who happens to be housed in Gryffindor. Now, at this tender age, let's see, she states she is 13 and a half, my what a grown up young lady, yes, quite. Now, she likes a young man whom she refers to as RL, and he is a 5th year in Gryffindor.

She really would like me to keep as much of her letter in confindence as she doesn't want to be teased by her cetelings. Now, we wouldn't want that at all for Miss Nym--, oops! Almost let the werewolf out on a moon filled night. Now, we definitely wouldn't care for that, now would we? Most assuredly not!

Now, let's see, her family has been Slytherins and Hufflepuffs. The H8ufflepuffs would adore anyone, so they aren't really concerned with in group and out group dynamics, as they mostly put everyone they meet into the in group. However, Slytherins are less immediate with that tendency. They would rather not get hurt, so most folks fall into the out group. For those relatives, our young lady friend would have tremendous worries regarding them warming up to an outsider.

Her classmates would likely not think too hard on such a union. I foresee that this couple will have trouble from ... possibly ... RL not considering that he is in a group of any kind, and thus, unlikeable, yet even more unlovable. Those whom are hurt much, dearly deserve to belong to a group, but sometimes don't feel as though there is a group that likes them. This may not be reality, just the Dementors attacks on a person till their resistence is broken and they welcome the kiss of the Dementors. Though, thankfully, the Dementors are all locked up again in Azkaban.

For those whom the Dementors like we need to take special care to show them extra kindness, and let them know they do deserve a place in the world and to be liked by other than Dementors, and to belong. Without the sense of belonging, one cannot reach one's greatest potential to quote that supposedly muggle psychologist, Maslow and his hierarchy.

Those whom fate has put additional burdens on have a hard time getting to the belonging stage, let alone becoming their fullest potential. So, when you see someone who is struggling with something, instead of impatience or irritation as your response and feeding the Dementors, take a moment, breathe a little deeper than usual, and ask if there is any way to help. Don't take a negative response from the one struggling as a personal thing, they may not know that the Dementors want them to be struggling and irritated and irrational when offered help. It's not personal to you what the other person does, it is only personal to them.

I'm sorry to get into such a low space with you, my dear readers, let's try to think of how to move forward with a smile on our heart and our faces, now there's a good food for thought.

Auntie Muriel

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